Oh humans. Why must we confuse things so?
We’ve taken a relatively simple concept like the Law of Attraction – which basically states like energy attracts like – and have twisted it into: “I can magically make someone love me with the Law of Attraction.”
Nevermind your crush is in a relationship with someone else.
Nevermind your crush isn’t attracted to you.
Nevermind your crush likes your best friend.
Nevermind your crush is a celebrity whom you’ve never met.
Nevermind the restraining order.
Screw all of that.
You will use the Law of Attraction to manifest a relationship with an unwilling stranger you’ve promised your heart to. You just know he’s the one. Your love is so strong he will have no choice but to one day wake up and be in love with you. You will imagine and believe him into reality. All you need to do is cut out pics of the both of you and create a vision board collage of you both in various states of marital bliss. The more you concentrate on him and believe he will be yours, the more it will ensure that the Law of Attraction will manifest that very person – and that very relationship – into your life.
I just don’t know how this rumor about the Law of Attraction got started. You just can’t use the Law of Attraction to attract a specific person, and thank God for that. Could you imagine if it actually worked this way? To have that kind of power over another person? Courtship would be total mayhem. Dating would be like Hades dragging Persephone down to the underworld – less about romance, more about abduction.
It’s not your fault, however. Just like the issue that I discussed in my karma blog, information about the Law of Attraction has gotten twisted and has taken on a life force of its own. Let me help clear it up so you can start using the Law of Attraction more effectively in your love life.
OK, so let’s start by saying love is good. Best emotion ever. Vital force of the Universe. Reason why we’re here. I would never tell you not to love.
However, your love is not enough to get someone else to love you. Why? Free will, baby. We’ve all got it. And the Law of Attraction can’t usurp another person’s free will. Free will, in a nutshell, is our God-given right to choose how and with whom we spend our lives. We’ve all got soul and ego-level agendas. Trying to control someone else’s free will is an exercise in futility that always backfires.
The Law of Attraction is not a magic wand you can wave to cast a spell on another person. With the Law of Attraction, you are BOTH the attractor and the attractee: What you put out comes back to you in the form of an animal, plant or mineral of the same vibration. It does not come back to you with a specific person hogtied and ready for love.
The Universe can’t deliver a specific person to you because that person has free will. People are not cars, jobs or houses. They are just like you with their own desires, soul lessons and life purposes.
And wait, there’s more. Consider this: If you’re working like mad to attract a specific someone in your life, there’s a good chance you’re sending out a hunter type of vibe. You’re not attracting, you’re chasing. And what you chase runs from you. Also, if you’re putting out the kind of energy that begs another to give their heart to you, you are telling the Universe that you are desperate and willing to give your power away to another person because you NEEEEEED them. These scenarios are less about love and more about desperation and control. And that’s what you’ll attract with this vibration: Desperate, controlling people. Love without reciprocation is simply obsession.
On a deeper level, keep in mind that the Earth is a school and relationships are a major part of the curriculum. A relationship has to provide some sort of value to both you and your partner’s soul contracts. If there are no lessons to be learned with a relationship (other than for you to learn to stop using the Law of Attraction like a love spell) the Universe will guide you to a more suitable partner. Fighting that guidance is what creates pain, heartache and longing.
The more you fight the Universe’s guidance, the worse you will feel. Trust me on this. You may think someone is perfect for you, but pheromones are blurring your vision. However, the Universe sees it all too clearly.
The good news is you do have a say in the TYPE of person you attract and have a relationship with. Like attracts like. Like attracts like. Repeat that until you get it. Because when you get it, you’ll know how to use it: You will attract someone who is a vibrational match to you. You may not have control over another person, but you do have control over your vibration.
I’m not saying that you and your partner have to like the same things, eat the same food, listen to the same music. You don’t have to be alike. However, the vibrations that you emit must match up.
How do you know what kind of vibe you’re putting out there? Just look at what, and who, you’re currently attracting. If you don’t like what you see, then you need to do an inventory of your belief system. Your love life is a direct reflection about what you believe and how you feel about yourself.
Once you take a more proactive role in your love vibration, you increase your chances of attracting the right person for you into your life. You’ll wind up with someone real and who reciprocates your feelings for them.
Start by loving yourself. That’s the best way to attract the person who is the right vibrational match for you. Focus on how wonderful and lovable you are, and focus on what you love to do. EXPECT that you’ll attract someone who will recognize how amazing you are, someone who can grow and learn along with you, and who will love you in the way you need. In the meantime, as the Universe is sorting out the details, kick back and enjoy your life.
Crystals like Rose Quartz are excellent for healing and opening the heart chakra. I suggest carrying a Rose Quartz or wearing one in a pendant like this one. Click image to learn more.
On a final note, having a crush on someone IS perfectly normal and it invariably happens. But instead of letting it make you crazy, desperate and love-sick, use it to your benefit. To do this, you need to first recognize that a crush-type of love is based mostly in fantasy. Once you recognize that you are fantasizing, use those fantasies to imagine the perfect love relationship. Yes, you can use your crush as a stand in for the perfect man or woman just as long as you realize that’s what they are: A representation, not the actual person you’ll wind up with. Don’t be surprised, however, when the love your life winds up having the same physical characteristics as the person you’ve been dreaming of. It’s weird how that happens. But that’s a whole other blog.
One of the most common mistakes that those who are unlucky in love tend to make, is that they view themselves in a bad light. Whether it is your appearance, your inability to find a life partner or your history of unsuccessful relationships – by having no love for yourself you are inadvertently blocking the way for others to express their love. By choosing to stay in an endless cycle of negativity and by dwelling on what isn’t, rather than what could be, how is the universe expected to be clear on what you are looking for? Focusing on the bad luck that you may have had in past relationships or dwelling on your inadequacies can only serve to further increase these misfortunes and hold you back from the love that you so truly deserve.